The Art Of Ology

Readers will know there is an “ology” for most of life’s problems. But few local readers here in West Lancashire are familiar with the ology practiced by WLBC officers. It’s “garbology”, the study of garbage.

It could refer to the excellent service we receive for paying our council tax by the weekly garbage collections from our council bins. Garbage in, garbage out, has been referred to as “The tree of nonsense is watered with error, and from its branches swing the pumpkins of disaster”.

And it happens in West Lancashire, where it is honed almost to perfection. Ask a simple question, don’t receive a simple answer. WLBC nurtures its tree of nonsense to perfection.

Most of the classic WLBC garbology emanates from the planning department, as is evident in the flooding issues in Burscough. But some comes from simple enquiries about expenditure of council tax on services including leisure and wellbeing. And more comes inevitably from the scandal of the Beacon Park Golf Course landfill as royalty income regurgitated from 23,375 lorry loads of it yet never saw the light of accountancy transparency. Likewise the invisible VAT.

In one instance of garbology a simple question about a Serco statement of “fact” by the inclusion of private golf courses was answered as it “was provided by Serco “as a general comparator to the market place”. So not a statement of fact then!

In another instance it seems that police monitoring of the Beacon Park Golf Course was included as part of the “daily routine police checks” so as “to reassure golf club members that the course is being patrolled and protected during the lockdown restrictions. Yet no police patrolling had ever been seen by golfers prior to the Covid-19 pandemic.

Readers might assume that WLBC garbologists are simply bullshitters. Either way it stops the public knowing the truth about areas of grave concern in this borough.

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