Major To Compare Boris Johnson To Dishonest Estate Agents?

It’s reported that Major will tell the Supreme Court

today that Boris Johnson should be “compared with dishonest estate agents!”.

Dishonest estate agents have reacted by comparing Major to a dishonest “Lothario who seduced Calista”. Actually Edwina Currie seduced HIM, as “The nation that has long associated Major with unglamorous, baggy Y-fronts was suddenly confronted with a somewhat steamier image”. Major had sued the New Statesman and Scallywag magazines who alleged he had an affair with a caterer who said “It wasn’t me but there is never any smoke without fire”.

Currie went on to write “steamy novels”

Exactly halfway through the Supreme Court’s hearing into the prorogation of Parliament, a somewhat alarming request was put to the Government’s legal team. Lady Hale, the President of the court, politely asked if Downing Street could set down in writing, by Thursday morning, what Boris Johnson will do if he loses.

“It was not the most encouraging omen for the Prime Minister, and it came on a day when the extremities of his powers were repeatedly probed by 11 Justices who have the ability to alter the course of history”.

Meanwhile, Austin “Maverick” Mitchell opines “I’ve decided not to go to Luxembourg to tour the tax fiddles for my holidays”.

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